It’s a defining moment. We enter a training seminar, a classroom or a dinner party.
Where should we sit?
If we feel high in the pecking order of attendees, we’ll glad-hand folks as we arrive, asking a nonchalant, “How are you?” without waiting for responses. We take a place near the front of the room, expecting a high level of involvement.
The back of the room is reserved for those who are either anxious at the proceedings, expect to be bored, or both. Early on, these seats become crowded; these folks can gauge their degree of participation after performing extensive reconnaissance.
That leaves the “somewhere in the middle” seating, occupied by those who are either, (a.) front row want-to-bes who can ride the coattails of the super-confident sitting just before them, (b.) the last row want-to-bes who didn’t get there quickly enough, or (c.) the folks in the accidental middle ground, who must sort out how visible to be and how much obligatory conversation to generate.
It’s hard for those of us occupying this ill-defined, middle section to know how to behave. Nonetheless, it should be familiar to us because, in fact, most of our lives are spent here. We define mid-turf–we’re average folks among other average folks.
In this midsection, insecurities may filter out sentences, paragraphs, and entire conversations. Brains can become muddled over whether we are being sincere and who we really are meant to be. If we’re not careful, we can become observers, life passing us by.
I occupied this sizeable Middle Ground while attending college; no escape seemed possible.
Until, that is, I vowed to redefine the anonymous Middle Ground by seizing the opportunity afforded within the vast thrice-daily meal lines crowded with students awaiting cafeteria service.
I decided that each time I waded amidst my fellow students while in the meal line, I would intentionally meet the one person ahead and the one behind me in the queue. And I would allow myself to only talk about them—not me.
After a few months of doing this, I discovered one important thing.
The undervalued Middle Ground may offer the best seat in the house.